Hey, I didn't title it, she did. Except for the warning; that was my own.
"Yesterday was Women's Health Care Day at the capitol (of Oregon), sponsored by Planned Parenthood Advocates of Oregon. People came from all over the state to lobby their respective state legislators on a few particular issues facing the current Oregon legislature."
#1 This is not a democracy.
#2 Just what Oregon needs - a bunch of whiny bitches with skinned knees showing up bugging them all fucking day. I'm sure they were thrilled to see y'all coming up the steps. Especially en masse, because there's nothing more pleasant than a large bunch of PP activist feminist chicks running their damned mouths. Everybody needs more of that. People especially like it when you run your mouths at top volume, so feel free to yell and swear.
Well I'm not looking it up right now but there was another post that just had me laughing my ass off over there, in fact; it was just when I started this blog and I've been meaning to shred it. But I don't need to bring the funny because it's self-evident in this one.
See, this one "woman" (hey, it's hard to tell over there) described this problem she was having with ants. In her rented house. Every time she went in to brush her teeth the sink was full of ants. So she started poisoning them, except one day she saw just one little ant come up, and he was just so cute and cuddly and friendly she couldn't find it in herself to poison the little feller. So she stopped with the poison and decided - and I'm not kidding - to just TALK to the ants. You just can't make this stuff up. Talking to the ants. Everyone knows an ant can't move a rubber tree plant. She talks to them even when she's washing them down the drain...heheh. Oh to be a fly on the wall. (I guess she'd talk to me too, then, so nevermind.) So she starts asking them what it is about the sink that they love so much and why they're now infesting the floor and other parts of the bathroom (because you took away the poison? Just a guess.)
Then one day, the ants decided to show up on her computer desk instead. Now this was just REALLY too much for one feminist to handle - so she told those ants in no uncertain terms that they were NOT to bother her computer table anymore, to find somewhere else to congregate. Um, I think they listened because next thing she knew they were back in the sink. She's festering a nice big old colony there, ain't she? No wonder WisCon had to bring out a hazmat team to fumigate after the convention full of feminists and fatties. (If you ever look at Encyclopedia Dramatica, look up WisCon to see the hilarious antics. And I'm not kidding about the HazMat team, either - one of the chicks didn't wash her hands after contaminating them with her filthy feces, it got on the food and the whole hotel full of fat feminist chicks and unicorn-loving effete "men" got deathly ill. When they left the entire place had to be fumigated and cleared of the cholera these friendly souls brought with them.) I mean, the person who gets this rental house next is gonna have a hell of a time getting rid of this growing colony of ants festering away in the walls...and everywhere else.
I wonder if she's ever heard of the Argentinian ants and how they're destroying entire ecosystems? I mean, they're using US to travel on and it's one giant "global mega-colony" - as proven by the fact that they're on 6 continents (only one of which they belong on) and they're ALL the SAME COLONY. They're eating up other species' food - salamanders, newts - all dying because of these freaking Argentinian ants. Coming soon to a continent near you. Also, poison doesn't kill them; it just pisses them off. So good luck with that. I kind of hope that's what she's got, because that would be hilarious. Eagerly awaiting further news on this one. Did the little ant with high hopes make it? Will they carry off all the cats I'm sure she owns? Will the salamanders disappear? Tune in tomorrow on As The World Turns...
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